Oh, Tim. Why do you do this to me...
Before I begin, sorry that I haven't maintained this blog in a while. Been deep in work lately and never got the time. Thankfully I found some movies that are worth of a least a small mention of this review. So with that said...
Magnificent Seven is every bit as lacking by comparison to the original(s) as we expect, but still a fun ride. Antoine Fuqua directs the hell out of it, the cast is a lot of fun, and even if it can't match the originals attempt at morality by making the most cartoonish bad guys, it still makes a good excuse for some cool gunfights. Now I may be all for westerns with more brains than an average shoot-em-up, but it's honestly too much of a good time to worry about it. Check it out.
The Dressmaker is... something. One of those movies that pretty much does whatever it wants, but so committed and cartoonish about it that it's almost part of the charm. Adapting the old German play "The Visit" but for dressmaking, it's what you get when you mix a Jane Austen adaptation meets Fistful of Dollars and a pretty wacky one at that. Some affecting moments, occasional stumble in tone, but overall a fun ride with a demanding performance by Kate Winslet and a strange turn from Hugo Weaving. May or may not be a cult classic.
Blair Witch could not duplicate the appeal nor the rawness of the original movie, but an oddly effective horror entry in its own right. It's one of those batshit horror thrillers Adam Wingard and Simon Barrett (You're Next and The Guest) are always known for, and watching them do the original all over again but "updated" could not be more admirable. I know a lot are disgusted by found footage movies now - trust me I'm one of them - but I say this is worth a try. It's body-splittin' good.
Alright, time for Miss Peregrine...
MINOR SPOILERS AFOOT!!
The most frustrating thing about recent Tim Burton always lies in how I try to appease the ever-so-annoying discussion about the “style over substance” aspect of his movies. Not only because it seems pointless at first – let’s face it, with ol’ Tim, style IS substance – but it sounds like its missing the point of what he does best as an auteur. Building the whole foundation of zany, gothic aesthetic in many horror family movies, I always appreciate him as less than a grade-A storyteller and more of a character/atmosphere type of dude who pours every iconic horror/B-movie sensibility. After all, not every movie has to constrain itself to the mechanics of narrative. That’s why, given the right type of character focus, lean script, we get great movies like Edward Scissorhands, Beetlejuice, and the original Batman.
…Which is why it hurts so much when I see Burton failing at that too. Once he does start to “give a point” he farts out harsh misfires like Planet of the Apes, Alice in Wonderland, and Dark Shadows. Sure, he’s never been a good storyteller, but it sadly sacrifices all character and charm in result of trying to. And now he makes Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children, a canvas that could not be more up on his alley, in which he doubles down on the classic imagery and fun quirkiness most reminiscent of his heyday, while also restraining himself to a really clumsy, uninspired YA story. Thankfully, because of said visuals, this mess almost transcends itself from being yet another disposable Harry Potter knockoff based on the well-praised novel of the same name, thus safely nest itself in “good enough” territory.
As a tradition to these stories, it revolves around Asa Butterfield as Jake, an oddball child in suburban Florida living with a single father who was once told stories of “the Peculiars” by his grandpa when he was young. But after the grandpa suffered a mysterious and tragic death, Jake suggest that, in order to relieve the family from their loss, the family should seclude themselves in Wales. The dad obviously questions this decision, but it’s very clear that Jakes is following an ulterior motive; to track down said “Peculiars” and find answers to his grandpa’s death all while proving that both of them aren’t losing their marbles after all. Anyway, once they get themselves there, Jake finds a cave that somehow teleports him to an alternate timeline, where he meets (sorry in advance) Miss Peregrine and her peculiar children in a secluded mansion.
Alright, now for the tragically complicated part; Apparently Jake got stuck in a time loop that always plays the same day before the WW2 bombing that takes their mansion out. Miss Peregrine is one of the few that controls this loop and tries to prevent their house from burning. Meanwhile, Barron leads a cult of “anti-Peculiars” pretty much that lives off children’s eyeballs (just go with it) that attempts to find the house to feast off the children there…even though it wouldn’t matter in the long run and could’ve gone literally anywhere else. Oh, and since they’re in a loop, they have to make sure that every little event happens as it happens because... reasons? Oh, and each child have their own peculiarity that proves barely useful unless it’s in a third act fight scene. Oh, and Jake realizes that he has a special power himself that, without any further spoiler, doesn’t really prove useful in any point of the film anyway.
Yeah, this movie is a mess. Everything wrong with the movie strictly lies in the narrative; character traits prove little more than plot devices for later, the bad guy's plan makes no sense, and the whole apparatus just shoves whatever iconic YA material it wants without having it coherent at all. For example, there’s no reason why they couldn’t just find another place to hide after bombing their house or go back many years before then, or why the kids could just kill the bad guy (called the Barron) on the spot when he holds the mansion hostage. Another example comes from the third act that, while prove to be a fun ride regardless, crams way too much conflict and not enough explanation. First, it’s a fight with the bad guys (who to be fair look something out of Resident Evil, which is great), then it’s a giant elephant cardboard monster (???) and then it’s a bunch of Jason and the Argonauts skeletons and then Samuel Jackson as the final boss. It's nakedly aloof with its setup and nowhere near as coherent.
Oh, it tries to be coherent, but that’s another problem: It’s all setup and barely any emotion. Every line of dialogue is little more than setup, exposition, or occasional off-putting humor. Setting aside that the film aspires too much from any other similar movies like X-Men or Harry Potter, the film is too concerned with its mechanics and all the boring stuff that it never takes a breath and focuses on the characters. No one peculiar ever has a single character moment – save for one played by Ella Purnell who secludes herself in a sunken ship, which is literally only useful to get the characters into the third act quickly – that isn’t setup for later in the movie. This sadly renders Jakes arc, about getting accustomed to his new friends and acting as their guardian angel, trickling down into little more than a guy disobeying his dad because he really has the hots for this one chick who he saves in the end because, yeah, that’s not done enough it seems. Too much going on and not enough to make it mean something is a common problem in many stories like this, but lack of coherency deepens this blemish.
MASSIVE problems aside, this movie is a visual treat. To be quite honest, if you mute all the bullshit and add some Danny Elfman music, it probably would be great as a classic Tim Burton visual tour-de-force. Drawing himself back to the classic iconographies of his early work, he doubles down on gothic scenery and massive set designs most reminiscent of the old school German horror movies like Nosferatu and Dr. Caligari. It also makes sure that the contrast between the real world and the peculiar world blooms within the color pallets. This aesthetic is also the reason why the film dives headfirst into the scary stuff, as Samuel Jackson lingers on the screen like something that should’ve come out of a B-rated monster movie. As for the performances, Sam Jackson and Eva Green pretty much own this movie. With Jacksons hamming it up as the Barron and Eva Green playing as a nurturing yet dominant mother figure, they play their roles so well that you almost forget the rest of the casts’ otherwise competent deliveries.
Though otherwise, Miss Peregrine is, while by no means a disaster, a sad near miss by Tim Burton. It’s admirable, beautiful, and strangely evocative like all of his other works, but it’s also sadly inconsistent, bloated, and lacking of emotion. Had the filmmakers patch up the script or take out some of the BS, it would’ve been consistent. Heck, had the film embrace its lack of focus with the likes of, say The Dressmaker and at least give some character, it would’ve been worthy as a classic in its own right. But as my perspective stands, I say it’s just okay. Fans of the original books would get all their wishes fulfilled in this movie, and I'm not going to deny that. Fans of Burton would call this a return to form, and I say “let ‘em have it!” There’s no reason why anyone should demand a more narrative success, but if it means making the characters and the setting actually leaving an impact as a result, then it wouldn’t hurt. Take it for what it’s worth.
Rating: 6/10
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